Updates and Babble

A post at last!

Blogger is still blocked of course... But I am willing to have someone hack into my blog via an unsafe proxy.
Why not? It'll provide whoever is still reading this interesting entertainment.

Once again I am deep into what I like to call (EXAMINATION HELL)
Some updates then...

1)I'm going to barely pass my exams due to a painful bout of existential angst and some issues with regards to studying here. =/ Not good. For a strange reason the international student crisis didn't hit me till this semester.

2)Grace is coming over for 2 weeks 29/6-14/7!!! This means that everyone I love (with the exception of MELVIN :( will be here!) Life will prove to be awesome beyond belief.
P.S. Mei Cen will be here from the 3/7-10/7!!!! AMAZING!

3)I'm going somewhere fun during the summer! -Destination SECRET!

4)What else... hmmm. Oh. Cell group peeps are all leaving :( I guess we'll have a new one again next semester...

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Random thought with regards to pre-marital sex (for Christians... everyone else might be annoyed)

Sex before marriage is now a problem because at the age of 16, most people are biologically wired to "mate". However due to advances in medical technology causing extended life spans of the people, there is now a problem wherein people marry later. say 27-30. Earliest... 20, 23 maybe. Therefore, the extended suppression of our biological workings is insufferable and unnatural for most. Causing the above phenomenon (Pre-Marital sex) to happen.

Christian part:

Our biology is god's creation. So is marriage... Why then would he create something that is not in sync? Given the bible's historical context, most people then married way earlier than we do now. Our later marriages are caused by us having different priorities, distractions such as putting career, vanity, pride and social norms above family. Where does the distraction come from? - The other side is infinitely more cunning and clever than us.

Elaine

My favourite photo of Elaine for today... or rather yesterday.
P.S. The theme was street style (If it seemed uncharacteristic of my photography)

Expect Good

People always talk of how they have many facets to their personality. Each different, catered to specific persons.

Now, I suddenly see the power these people possess. If we choose to see good and expect good in others, will it cause them to respond by showing us their good sides? Giving us what we expect and want? Perhaps thats a way to create more good in this world. The power isn't in the shape shifting, it lies in the catalyst to the shape shifting. It lies in us and what we expect of this world and other people.

So, perhaps its time to subtly add positives to our expectations of people. When they give us what we expect, a little bit more good would have materialized in them. Hopefully anyway...

To remember what Wabbit taught me

Wabbit passed away after 6 days of living under our roof. I like to think that it would have died anyway, and that we gave it a good few days before he had to leave.

6 Days may seem short, but he taught me so much. Even now, the space below our TV on my right feels empty and quiet.
In his memory, I must and will remember what he so graciously imparted.

1) The pain a parent feels when her child rejects her/him.

When Wabbit first came, he was extremely afraid of us. The slightest hand movement in his direction would accelerate his heart rate and cause him to tremble. The ache in my heart must have been similar to that of my mother's as I time and again pushed her away. Her's would 0f course be magnified greatly... or one would hope.

2) Responsibility

Wabbit was my first pet. To have to take care of another living thing is such a responsibility. To feed it, change its water, to entertain it, to care for its complex physiological, psychological needs. It nearly drove me mad as I strove to read its mind. Wabbit was immensely clever. It normally took him a day to escape his new enclosure... At night, I would lie in bed awake with the fear that he would escape and hurt itself. I remember sitting by his enclosure and just wondering about he was thinking. Perhaps he was trying to read my mind too.

3) The struggle in a parent's heart with regards to letting the child run free or keeping the child safe.

I knew that Wabbit wanted to leave the enclosure, he wanted to explore on his padded paws, most of all he wanted to be free. I so desperately wanted him to be happy, yet I wanted more for him to be safe. So I started forming ideas to bribe him... Perhaps I'll buy him something to play with, I'll let him run about but only under my supervision. (Never got to put them into action...) Our parents must have felt the same turmoil. The struggle to do what is right, the struggle to let go, exactly like Siddhartha and his son.

4) How to watch someone die.

Wabbit was very sick. He had seizure after seizure, he struggled to breathe, his heart stopped and restarted. Sometimes his seizures were so strong they contorted his tiny body twisting it with pain. Once he even screamed. Wabbit taught me how to watch someone die.

5) What death means.

Death creates a void. A void that will never be filled because nothing would ever fit exactly in that very unique space created for its existence.

Wabbit may have died, but I shall leave my favorite passage here for him... A passage most of you might have read before on this blog. Wabbit may be gone, but he exists as him in us, his soul remains in those who remember and were affected by him. That will be Wabbit-the Wabbit that enters the future and becomes part of it.

Boris Pasternak's-Dr Zhivago

-Well, what are you?...What is it about you you've always known about yourself? Your kidneys? Your liver? Your blood vessels? No. However far back you go in your memory, it is always in some external, active manifestation of yourself that you come across your identity-in the work of your hands, in your family, in other people. And now listen carefully. You in others-this is your soul. This is what you are. This is what our consciousness has breathed and lived on and enjoyed throughout your life-your soul, your immortality, your life in others. And what now? You have always been in others and you will remain in others. And what does it matter to you if later on that is called your memory? This will be you-the you that enters the future and becomes part of it.

Happy Birthday!

Two to three years ago I met this very interesting fella. He then proceeded to become an awesome friend of mine. Yeah sure we had some complications on our way to the solid friendship that I hope will never end. We have both changed, left the place where we met and... grew up a bit I hope. I think he grew skinnier :) Haha! But one thing has remained the same. Two years ago for his birthday I did the corniest thing. I'm not going into the gory details but... I think you remember. (I would send some over... but they might grow mold)

The message is the same.

"Happy Birthday Jit Yew. Thank you for being my boulder."

HAHAHAHA! Terrible photo I know =D
P.S. I wrote it... and forgot to post it :(

Wabit- 小甜甜

I have a rabbit. Its giving me insomnia.
Its too smart for its own good.
It likes cardboard.

Missing Leon

If I don't see Leon during the week, there is always this picture! =D Elaine! This is for you too!

Cowardice

I'm kind of cowardly...

I'm scared of myself, of things and most of all, of people.
At the moment, I'm terrified of complication. I saw it in the face and promptly did a 180! It was so fast I didn't even catch myself doing it.

Chicken, is that what you are calling me?!
Well... hahahaha! yep! Chicken here!

P.S. I TOOK THAT PHOTO! (Not one of my best... but it gets the message across)

I do not like being attacked. Be it by someone everyone thinks is nonsensical or someone that everyone is wary of. It all boils down to the fact that the person is attacking me.

I wonder if you can fly kites in the rain.