I have been away for two semesters. The first resulted in the end of my first relationship, the second caused my next to bloom. Yet result or cause, the ending of each semester left my left hand swinging empty.
However I have through the passing of my first year learnt the difference between leaving and being left behind. When I left the first time, I thought I was the one who suffered. I thought I had to endure the pain of leaving at least 10 dearest behind while they had only one to lose. Now I know better, the excitement of a new place the seeking of a life where none of those left behind has left a mark on, the meeting of new people adds immense padding to the fall.
Those left behind however have to endure the exact same life only with a "you-shaped" hole punched into it. They have to walk down those very streets you once walked with them. They have to frequent the same stalls, pass by the house that you once filled. They have to live wondering if the excitement of your new world has replaced the place you had in their hearts. After all all 10 of them left behind miss you with all their hearts and you? You have to divide your affection by 10, your longing, your time...
Indeed it is much easier to leave than to be left behind. If I could choose, I would leave. Over and Over again.
1 comment:
very correct!
When i walked my uni in the first week, it felt weird without being able to see my friends from Fudan Cell...
Good job on putting up the google ads. Appreciated.
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